“People really do this for fun?”, I think to myself as I contentrate on air intake.
Breathe, 2, 3, 4
Exhale, 2, 3, 4
It’s day three of couch to 5k. The worst day yet. My body and my lungs are not aligning. I think it’s the piece of gum I decided to chew. I long to sprint like a gazelle, but today, I’m resembling Jumbo the elephant.
Thump, Thump, Thump.
Is it time to walk yet?
And while we’re here, let’s talk about sports bra’s. Are these things manufactured on the darkside by minions of the devil?
I remind myself that this is not forever, just today. I remind myself that I have 35 years of poor habits to correct. Achieving this goal will be a process. I envision crossing the finish line at the 5k I have signed up for in July. I envision leading my youngest daughter’s girls on the run group next year. I envision the size 10 waist I will have when I reach my final weight loss goal. I envision participating alongside of my husband in the physically challenging courses he likes to run.
I envision ditching the steroid prescription I have been given to manage my asthma.
But i’m aggravated. How did I let myself get to this point?
I’m embarrassed about how hard this is to figure out when experienced runners make it look so easy. If I can barely make it through a minute, how on earth am I going to make it through 30 minutes in just a few short weeks? Plus, I am sore in places that I don’t even want to talk about. When will I see progress?
It’s the hard that makes me want to quit.
It’s the impossible that encourages me to stop before I start.
It’s discomfort that leads me to hide in my comfort zone.
I must decide now that I can run after the things I want from life, or I can let them get away. Only I can decide.
A plan must be formed the moment I decide to chase a goal. My plan is my course of action to reach the goal. My plan is my road map. It keeps me on track. My plan reflects benchmarks as well as progress toward the finish line.
I must then set my eyes on the goal as opposed to the things I am leaving behind. When I start a new goal, I write down the reason why. My reason why is the driving force to get me moving when I would rather sleep a little longer or park my happy hiney on the couch (sans sports bra) with a good read. My reason why redirects my attention from what I am missing to what I will be gaining.
Then I will be ready to push myself past my current limits. In this case, I enlisted my husband as a running partner. Part for expertiece and part for accountability. He molds my perceived weakness into perspective. He runs along side me with patience. He coaches when necessary. The gum was his idea. Hmm???
It has taken me a long time to realize that a life worth living is not driven by comfort. It is driven by the pursuit of growth. Every single step I take in pursuit of my goal adds a building block of character that honors the purpose God has created me for.
I firmly believe that you fight for the things that mean most to you. My health is worth fighting for. Time spent with my husband and kids is worth fighting for. My dreams are worth fighting for. I have decided running is worth my effort even when it’s a fight to reach the finish line.